Movie Review

Movie Review
 
King Arthur
Commentary by J.Chiam
 
 
          Since the football season is temporary stalled, or maybe you could just say that Copa America and Asian Cup doesn’t really appeal much since the hype of Euro 2004, I’ve reverted to comment on movies. One could always try to argue that me being a football fan, why do I not take interest in these other two tournaments. The reason is simple. Deprived of broadcasting on South American leagues and lack of publicity are the reasons to name a few. Asian Cup? C’mon, let’s not make too much excuses okay?
 
          Back to the topic. Despite of lack of responds and hype from other movie goers, I persisted at watching one of my favorite legends come to life and to also enjoy war movies as well as swash-buckling displays of sword fighting. Famous characters such as Sir Launcelot and Merlin were clouding my mind as I made my way into the theatre. I had my first wave of doubt upon setting my eyes on the poster, though. Is that King Arthur? He looks more like an FOE tutor than a majestic king and gallant warrior. Brushing those thoughts aside, I took my sit as the curtains of the giant screen were unveiled and we were taken back hundreds of years into the past.
 
          To spare you the details and to also avoid revealing the story line I will decline to write about the story line of the show. But these are my comments on the movie I spent RM 10 on.
 
          First of all, from the very first 5 minutes of the show I knew that they had got it all wrong. The time was set during the Roman Empire. It was the Dark Ages, yet to me more of Wrong Ages. King Arthur was not of that time. You do not see knights running around and fighting during the time of Julius Ceasar. 2ndly, you do not call another a “Knight” and not wear any steel armor. One of the scenes that disgusted me most was when “King Arthur” described his teammates as “brave Knights.” Rule number one: A knight wears a full body steel armor, including the helmet which has a mask that covers their face. During those times, knights bear pride in the design of their face masks. Each different mask represents their identity and character. Knights during those times are considered as “Datuks” now. It is a promotion, a position. That’s why now you still find knighthood in Britain. People who were promoted are like Sir Sean Connery, Sir Elton John. You do NOT proudly proclaim yourself as a knight and yet prance around in a mini skirt, oops, Roman uniform.
          What with era and characters gone horribly wrong, almost half of the movie has already been severely damaged. And yet it is not enough. The producers of the movie have no idea who the characters truly are. Sir Launcelot is supposed to be a noble and brave knight, one of the knights of the Round Table of whom his name worthy to be remembered by. Yet in the movie he looks like some Italian mafia who so happened to be in that character. Another big let-down is Merlin, the great wizard and powerful magician in that era. He was so influential and powerful in the courts of King Arthur that he was often consoled for the decisions the King makes. And yet what did the movie made of him? A poor, dirty, old street beggar who lives in the jungles. Even Tarzan was more glorious than him. Oh yea, he did have an army of barbaric man-monkey-like warriors.  I guess there were some significance there. Tarzan could call on his animals, so could Merlin.
         
          Trying to imitate an epic like LOTR and the Last Samurai has not really worked out for this movie. One of the moments of these great war movies to me, is when the army stand face to face with the enemy on the battlefield. When fear and anxiety overwhelms the troops, the leader or king usually gives an inspiring, and powerful short speech which could determine the outcome of the battle. Upon hearing this few words, bravery and courage rises from cowardice and fear. Upon hearing the words, men turn from normal persons to warriors, and to certain extend beasts which crushes everything in their way. King Arthur tried using before their final battle. But there is a catch. His so-called “Knights” were the ones to volunteer for battle. They were ALREADY spirited and committed to battle. When this is the case, you do NOT need to waste your breathe and time trying to stir them up again. And come on, where were only 7 men. What’s there to shout about? Why add ajinomoto to an already tasty meal? You only add salt when it’s blend. Somehow, the movie has succeeded to make something so beautiful into something so horribly lame and disappointing.
 
          The rest of the movie is basically trying to copy the formulas for recent successful war movies. The bottom line is: King Arthur is about a movie about a person who HAPPENED to have the name Arthur, and has no resemblance of the legendary King Arthur. There was one consolation though, watching Keira Knightley fighting barbarians draped in duct tape was amusing and sensual the same time. Hmm…Keira Knightley…perhaps SHE should be the Knight?