Thoughts Unleashed.

Sunday, March 07, 2010

My Influence

It's funny how 5 people from a small town in the US can influence an average joe living hundreds of miles away.

Well they did it for me anyway.

I can't imagine another band that would make me wanna go all the way and take all the trouble to see them.

Pretty much what I do with my drum sticks came off from this 5 people.

What do I expect?


Maybe the itch again? I used to have this tingling sensation when I watch other bands on stage before. It got me all restless, sweaty and tingly.

I've forgotten how that feels like again.

Maybe it will visit me again soon. :)

Saturday, February 06, 2010

The Engaged Rockstar Wanna Be

Well I got engaged. :)

Sometimes I like to think of Engagement as being "engaged" or "locked on" to all the responsibilities of becoming a family man. Just like a bird which builds its nest with dry sticks and leafs from scratch, suddenly thoughts and plans which we used to think "far away" or for "older men" land right in the hands which you used to hold the ring in proposal.

Nothing wrong with it. It's enjoyable. And you realize, that to go through all this plans and to do life together, love is the most important thing that holds both of you together. Without it, all the plans stand on sinking sand, waiting to crumble anytime.

I guess the difference between me and other engaged men is that I still wanna be a rockstar.

Recently attended Saosin concert, and heading with my band to Paramore in March.

It's been a while since I attended a concert. Being it local or foreign.

and it does something to you, everytime I see someone rocking it out on stage, every single time, at every different stage in life.

every time I watch a concert on youtube, it gives the same chilling feeling to me too.

the challenge for me, is being an engaged rockstar wanna be.

I dread the day when I have make a decision, if I ever have to, give up my rocking dreams. I don't wanna wait till I'm too old, with creakin' bones, or have to go back to a kid right after every concert, to do this.

I'm at this stage in life where something's just waiting to burst, to explode. Being it in my career, my dreams.. I feel like a raging tiger, being locked up, with all the energy, just waiting for the key to unlock and unleash the person I am.

I shall wait.

I shall wait upon the Lord.

Till then, I shall enjoy the view from here.

Tuesday, January 05, 2010


Well I guess that's that.

28 came and went. I still can't believe I'll be hitting the number 3 in two year's time. How can that be?

I've been thinking of how to sum up 2009 for the past few days ever since the dawn of the new year. I guess I'd say 2009 was a year of coming of age, and turning young again.

Coming of age because my years caught up with me, and I found myself lying on the hospital bed waiting for surgery on my knee, and few weeks later, found myself staring at the ceiling of the dentist's clinic while listening the sounds of drilling within my teeth.

It took a toll on me when I had to walk on crutches, and had to suffer the ever nagging pain on my knee while recuperating. Mentally, I'll never able to kick a ball freely, or jump and sprint as carelessly as before.

I turned young again when I turned to new hobbies and interest. Transformers came and never left. Heh. I started on beginner's photography and toy painting. What started as an interest paid off when I had to use these skills in my new work project that I've been handling for the past 6-7 months. Nah, not the toy painting. Tho I hope some day it might pay off too. heh.

I came to understand myself a lil' better. I thought I had no insecurities, and that insecurities are for weak people. Only to find that having that thought itself is my very own insecurity.

I wonder what's installed for me in 2010?

I've begun to embark on a journey of searching for my one passion. I'm still naive to think that I will be able to true-ly enjoy my "work" and earn big bucks from it.
Not that it sucks where I'm at, but there's still something missing. I feel that I've not yet hit the G-spot in my career.

Somethings still don't change tho. I still wanna be a rock star. :)

I still love music. I still love drums.

I wonder how would I like look back at 2010 1 year from now?

Well, I guess I should give thanks. Give thanks for being alive. I should consider making 28 an achievement.

After all, not everyone gets to get here. :)

Saturday, November 28, 2009

I will never forget.

I watched this video some time ago...few years back..If I remember correctly...

and I made a vow that the sounds that I make from the drums..will be heavenly and life changing.

Yes, I do get admirations...get praises..and affirmation..and whatever you get from making the loudest noise on stage..I admit..

But there's nothing more satisfactory..nothing more powerful than to see a man giving up his most prized talent...and to see it combine with the power of the most high God..

this is where you can "see" the beauty of music..and not listen..

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Dark Nights

Just remembered the topic that was shared last sunday service.

Well it's not exactly dark nights for me. No thunderstorms lightning flashes tsunamis or earthquakes.

But yea, it ain't a bunch of roses with sunshines at the moment.

Hm...been a while since I articulate my experiences in words here. Most of the time I just like pouring pictures on the blog now.

Anyway, its the first time that I have a burden weighing on my shoulders for so long. Well, this time it's not just me tho. It's us. We. On Our shoulders.

I've got mine and she's got hers. Feels like we keep bringing our problems to Him and still nothing happens. If our troubles are on a bowl, feels like it's been "rendam-ed" with prayer sauce over and over again till it's all soggy.

Every day I wake up and work my socks off and we still face the same freakin' problem. Yea. I know the whole team feels it too.

Every day she wakes up and she faces the same freakin' problem too.

We're running out of ideas, running out of resources. I'm running out of words to encourage too.

We keep telling ourselves soon, soon.. we'll see the light at the end.. But doesn't feel that way now.

Lord, why is it this long this time? This time, it's the duration, not the intensity.


Saturday, September 12, 2009

Dinner time! (picture continuation)

Dinner Time!!

It's been a while since I was able to enjoy home cooked any effort to cook it up is warmly welcomed. :)

The ingredients...

The "chefs"....

The results...


Monday, September 07, 2009

My new camera

Phew. Been ages since I last visited here. Much has happened. But I think I'll just let the pictures speak for itself.

Bought myself a new camera, Lumix LX 3. One of THE most coveted cameras in the market. Believe me, it took quite a hunting before I got myself this baby.

Anyway below are the first few shots I took with my new camera during my recent trip to Muar.

SLR quality? :P

These pictures were taken without flash and under extreme low light conditions.

F 2.0, S 8, ISO 200

F 2.0, S 1/30, ISO 200

Got meself a very willing model. :)

Internet speed is turtle slow. Will upload more shots for next post.

How are the pictures?