Floating Point

Back at AS for a week's holidays. It's only been 10 days. Feels like I've been exposed to so many things which I haven't really tasted before.

Part of the reason I chose penang, was because I wanted to escape. To escape from everything I was having. Christian friends, awesome church, the lifestyle I was having. I wasn't really backsliding. I was just curious to know what is it being outside a Christian circle. I was like a curious sheep, wandering to dangerous grounds, just to peak at what lies ahead.

And I escaped..

And I ran...

And I found emptiness.


Being alone out here, has taught me that I cannot live without God in my life. I'll go insane. I won't survive. I've come to a point, where I cannot afford to lose God. I'm typically holding on to Him. Have you ever come to a point, where everything is stumbling down? Where disappointments just hits you in the face. Where frustration takes over. Where you feel so helpless. Where you dream about your troubles, and wake up finding it hard to sleep again for fear of having the same dream again.

I have...

I brought it upon myself. I was the one who wanted to 'venture out'.

And I had nowhere but to look up. And to reach out my hand.

And to cry.

And God smiled and reached down.

And touched my hand.

And caught hold of it. And said ' Let's do this together.'

I had to learn to trust God in areas of my life where I am helpless. In areas where I'm disappointed. Where I was saddened.

It's a fragile thing, trusting people with the most sensitive areas of your life. That's why I'm holding on to God.

And He responded. :)

Ok you might I'm emo or watever. I don't really care.

In a way it's changed me. It's opened my eyes.

I thought working life would draw me away from God. It's the opposite actually.

Funny how things always work out the way we least expect it to be.